Soul care & Self care

“Sometimes you get tired while pursuing this thing called justice, and you just have to pause, breathe, and steal away until the dust kicked up in that day’s battle settles. Sometimes you just have to take a moment to feed your soul.” I love Donna Barber’s quote here, from her book Bread for the Resistance, because she doesn’t deny the everyday struggle. She acknowledges that many days feel like a battle, and our work is important. So important, in fact, that we have to pause (often) to feed our souls.

So what is soul care and how is it different from self-care? We know that self-care acknowledges that our body, mind and emotions need caring for—whether that’s through getting enough sleep, water, healthy food, counseling, time with friends, time for fun or relaxing…that’s all part of self-care. Soul care acknowledges that we have a spirit as well, that we are created by the awesome Creator of the Universe, that we are deeply loved. Soul care validates that we also need to rest with God, listen to God, talk with God. Spiritual direction offers a place for soul care, but we are invited to do it every day—to create space to reflect on our spiritual lives, our self-image, our God-image, and to find rest in our Belovedness. We don’t just care for our bodies (as in healthy self-care), but we also rest in the fact that we ARE CARED FOR.

We receive the beautiful, yet sometimes elusive, invitation to, “Be still and know that I am God” (Psalm 46:10 NIV).

Soul care may look different from day to day, week to week. Some days it may be taking a walk and talking to God about what’s on my heart, or what I’m frustrated about. It may be lighting a candle while I read my Bible, to help quiet my mind and remind me that I’m in sacred space with God. It may be journaling or writing a note to God after I read a Psalm. It may include worship music, in a cultural style that lifts my soul.

But I’ll be honest…some days it’s hard to get there. Some days are so heavy that it’s a battle, and I don’t “feel” very spiritual. If I wake up and look at my social media, and my anxiety rises, or my anger & frustration hits hard, it’s work to get to the soul care I need. But there are things that have helped (I’ll keep adding blogs about those), including taking my frustrations and anger to God. We don’t have to hide from God. God sees, God cares, and God still loves me, even when I don’t think I’m “getting it right”.

When I think about soul care and self-care, I think about a time that we had a J4R gathering (Jesus 4 Revolutionaries), and we were discussing this topic. Most of the activists shared about helpful self-care practices they’ve done. While many in our group were longtime followers of Jesus, and were able to share about their spiritual journeys and their “soul care” practices, I could see the confusion on one young woman’s face. I loved her honesty as she soon spoke up and said, “Ok, so I know that I can make an appointment at the doctor for self-care, make an appointment for a pedicure, or call my friend to talk over coffee when I need it.  But who do I make an appointment with for soul care?”  

That young woman inspired me to go into the practice of spiritual direction. Of course, ultimately we all need an “appointment” with God…but sometimes it helps to have another listening companion on the spiritual journey. So I went back to school to be a spiritual director.

More on Soul Care

Drawing deeply into the heart of God and giving God our cares is also our invitation from Jesus. “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light” (NIV Mt. 11:28-30).  

But what does “easy” mean for those of us who carry so much pain—our own and that of others?  It means that Jesus is carrying that WITH us. (And it doesn’t nullify the fact that there may be work to do later). He carries our losses, our anger, our disappointments with us. Saying that Jesus’ yoke is easy doesn’t mean that LIFE is easy. Jesus experienced much rejection and betrayal on earth, so He gets it. Whatever burdens I am carrying, I can acknowledge that God sees and knows, and wants me to lay it down, or ask Jesus to carry it with me. For me, sometimes I sense the invitation to pause, and spend some time journaling or imagining laying those things down. Sometimes I say, “Jesus, this sucks. This is too heavy…I need you to help me carry this…or help me lay it down!”

But in all honesty, sometimes we’re too exhausted to start here, with the soul care part. We have to START with self-care and self-kindness, before we can even ask or receive anything from God. Sometimes I need a nap first or a good cry or a walk or fresh air before I can get to soul care—before I can connect with God’s heart at all. We get exhausted (emotionally, physically and/or mentally). For me, sometimes I start by asking God what I need for self care. Acknowledging our humanity and need for self care can be step one ;)…and then let yourself slowly move into caring for your soul as well, listening for God’s heart for you. God will be there, waiting to give rest to your soul…

@soulcarewitherica

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